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 By  Staff Reports Published 
1:28 pm Saturday, November 29, 2003

Thanksgiving: No fun for turkeys

By Staff
I know that you should not eat me. I truly am bad for you. We turkeys have bones that could choke you. I also think that turkeys are bad to eat because I have a ghost that will haunt whoever eats me. There are night crawlers in my legs that poison anyone who kills me or tries to eat me. My friends are dying off and if you eat one, one day we turkeys will not exist. I surely think that our bad-smelling turkey wings do not belong in those little packages at the grocery store. Plus, I do not want to end up like Tonya Turkey did. A man tried to send the remains of Tonya down the garbage disposal. Later that night, the pipes burst and turkey went everywhere! Now, thanks to Tonya, he refuses to eat turkey. Just let this tradition fade away and I promise you that your Thanksgiving will be better!
Samra Ward
Hi, my name is Mr. Gobble. I'm here to tell you why not to eat me on Thanksgiving. I don't taste good. Chicken meat is a lot juicer than mine. You also might choke on my wish bone which is very deadly. You might not want to eat me because I'm still young and have a lot of fat. I also have a disease called Ukontage. It is very deadly to humans. So I will taste like a rotten piece of baby diapers. I have to see my mom for Thanksgiving because she's old and wants to see me again, so don't eat me. I want to live to have a Mrs. Gobble and children. I want to be able to have all my tail feathers soon so don't eat me. If you were in my place you would feel this way too, so don't eat me!
Alicia Dyess
Hi, my name is Kimmy the Turkey. I believe that you shouldn't eat me because I'm old and poisonous and you could get sick. I taste bad because I have worms. I think you should eat ham because it's juicier and more tender than I am. If you eat me, you'll get Turkey Madness. Your hair will fall out, you'll turn yellow and your body will wrinkle up so bad that you'll look like an accordion worm. You shouldn't want to eat me because there's more delicious, juicy and mouth watering meats. My most main reason is that I don't want you to eat my friends and family. I have grandkids you know.
Dominique McCoy
Hi, my name is Tina the Turkey. I want to talk to you about not eating me for Thanksgiving. I have seen so many turkeys eaten for Thanksgiving. I just lost my best friend named Tom. He was eaten last week. So here is where I draw the line. No more turkey for Thanksgiving!! You should not eat turkey for Thanksgiving because we have a secret sickness called Turkey Lurkey. You will be sorry you ate us because someday we will be extinct. Another reason you should not eat us is because you can eat other things like ham, peanut butter and jelly, macaroni and cheese and other things.
Elizabeth Case
You humans should not eat turkey. You shouldn't eat turkey because every time you kill a turkey, you kill my friends and family. Plus, in turkey years, we age by fives so I am 250 years old and in human years I am 50 years old, so I probably don't taste very well. Being older gives you diseases. I have gout, arthritis and gobblegobbleshoematome. Gobblegobbleshoematome is a disease that little small bugs get inside you and live. And if you have chosen me to be your turkey for this holiday, you will find some nasty surprises.
Lakeia Kirksey

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