Rants and Rambles
By By Tony Krause / assistant sports editor
May 2, 2003
We here at the R &R offices came out of the weekend licking our lips to write about the strange occurrences over the weekend.
Just when we thought it couldn't get any better than an incredibly kind coach and an agent out of "Jerry Mcguire," the world of sports offered even more fuel to the fire to rant and ramble all about.
Seriously folks, the office had to start handing out bibs we were drooling so much about the prospect of transcribing letters to screen this week.
So without further ado, let's jump right into the good, the sneaky, the putz and the sleazy.
THE GOOD
The Portland Trailblazers get ripped more than any team in the NBA, and for the most part, it is with good cause.
The collection of hoops talent and boneheads in the fine state of Washington is comparable to none.
Rasheed Wallace, Damon Stoudamire, Bonzi Wells and the rest of the crew have set the bar so high for dysfunction that no NBA squad can hope to reproduce the pure comedy and reefer smoke coming out of Portland.
Which made what head coach Maurice Cheeks did for teenage singer Natalie Gilbert last Friday all the more impressive.
Gilbert froze signing the National Anthem before the Blazers/Mavericks playoff game, and for reasons unknown, the words were not running across the scoreboard like at every other professional venue in America.
Cheeks showed everybody that the Jail, er, Trailblazers are not all out of control millionaires by walking up to the young lyricists side and helping her through a petrifying situation.
The look and mouthed thank you from Gilbert to Cheeks alone is enough to make anyone believe in the innate goodness of the human spirit.
THE SNEAKY
Sneaky may be a little harsh, but uber-agent Drew Rosenhaus gets our vote for the slickest man alive.
The representative of former Miami running back Willis Magahee never stopped working until his man's name was called at the NFL draft by the Buffalo Bills.
Rosenhaus ran Magahee at the cameras so much before the draft it felt like the Hurricane back was this year's blockbuster movie.
Personally, we here at the R &R offices were waiting for presidential style commercials telling us how well the back has recovered from his career-threatening knee injury.
Rosenhaus didn't stop campaigning throughout the draft, as he and his client were shown on cell phones throughout the first round.
Why where they on the phone? Who were they talking to?
This is were it gets really good They were talking to each other from less than an arms length away to get teams nervous that they were talking contract with other potential suitors.
THE PUTZ
At R &R, we remember our college days of the University of Missouri with great fondness. It also helps only being three years removed from the campus so most things are still fresh in the mind.
So when we found out the Iowa State head basketball coach Larry Eustachy was not just caught but photographed at an off-campus apartment, swigging brews and smooching co-eds, there was a certain amount of pride in our hearts.
You want to talk best party school, hey, Missouri is so wild even 40-plus year olds can't help but be sucked into the fray.
Though one thing is troubling, Eustachy was photographed clutching a Natural Light.
We here at the R &R offices have no problem admitting to downing our share of Natty Light, though we found the Milwaukee Best to be a better buy usually, but we were in college. We didn't have much cash.
Eustachy makes a million a year, without endorsements, you would think the coach could have brought a higher end brew to the party.
Just goes to show you, if you are too old for a college hoopla, you need to bring a better beer. Who knows higher quality beverages may have kept the coach's little photo shoot secret.
Of course that is doubtful considering the explanation Missouri student and whistle blower Sean Devereaux gave for busting coach Larry.
THE SLEAZY
Why can't coaches at Alabama just stay out of trouble.
New football coach Mike Price is getting the coach Larry treatment because of allegations that he used his school credit card to charge escort service fees during a visit to Pensacola, Fla.
It is also being alleged that the new Tide coach rolled out a lot of cash at a Gentlemen's Club, and a young woman rang up around $1,000 in room service bills on the coach's or possibly university's dime.
Price appeared at a golf event Wednesday and told reporters that he's eager to clear up all the rumors and innuendo.
Well there you go.
Price is meeting with university officials and a decision on his future may be announced on Saturday. Can you say job search?