It's hard to be cool in a fanny pack

By Staff
Kim West, Franklin County Times
I recently read an article that advised people to wear fanny packs if they are caring for small children, instead of carrying a backpack, bag or purse.
To me, fanny packs – possibly the funniest compound noun in the English language – are in the same family as Crocs and umbrella hats – they are very handy, but even Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie would look silly wearing them. In case you've never heard of a fanny pack, it's a small fabric pouch that's strapped around the waist and is typically fastened with a zipper.
Fanny packs, which are also known as belt bags (Phillipines) and bum bags (United Kingdom), remind me of elementary school field trips. I attended Owens Elementary in Athens during the early 1990s, which is when fanny packs seemed to rise to prominence in the U.S.
I have a photo of several of my classmates during a fourth-grade trip to Ivy Green in Tuscumbia, and one of them – our high school's starting running back – is sporting a raccoon track haircut and a multi-colored fanny pack. Thankfully, there aren't any pictures to use as evidence at my class reunion that I wore a fanny pack, although I'm sure I did.
Hikers, cyclists and athletic trainers – people who are constantly on the move with supplies and require free use of their hands – favor fanny packs. Apparently, psychiatric ward technicians also wear them, because one of my former co-workers during college came to work one day still wearing a black fanny pack. In addition to being a recreation center supervisor on campus, he also worked at a hospital, and he said he wore a fanny pack because he had to carry medical supplies and needed both hands to restrain patients if they attacked him. So maybe fanny packs deserve to be considered in the same class as life jackets and seat belts.
The fanny packs I grew up with were usually inexpensive and made out of the same fabric as book bags. Now, high-end designers such as Louis Vuitton, Prada and Coach are marketing fanny packs as body wallets and belt bags. So instead of plunking down anywhere from $200 to $2000 for a Coach bag or purse, you can now treat yourself to a Coach brown leather fanny pack – er, belt bag – for less than $75.
All I really wanted to find out was who invented the fanny pack. If you know the answer, please let me know.
And if you ever visit the UK, make sure you refer to fanny packs as a hip pack or bum bag – trust me.